I want to write about this. I really do. At the same time, there is so much ikkyness around it that makes me feel extremely nauseous. The last one year, I’ve met a lot of interesting people. We’ve conversed a lot about work and life and things that go around it. The conversations have made me think, the conversations have made me feel devastated. The conversations have inspired me and helped me push myself harder in the journey that I willingly chose. The conversations have slowed me down.
The big advantage of meeting people across cities, across walks of life, across a broad spectrum of designation and diverse outlook towards life, it has helped me see a world that’s not necessarily mine. I am but reminded of this tale from mahabharath. Yudister , or dharmaraj was a man plagued by a massive bias. He only saw good. He saw the good because it was in his nature to be that way. He was incapable of spotting the evils around him.
I’m not that.
Lets just say that living in my own world, in the lap of being goofy, I was and possibly still am naïve about a lot of things around me.
My bias kick in. My reasons have been quite simple and candid enough. Just because I cant imagine myself in the spot, quickly helped me eliminate the possibilities that the world around me faced. One such thing that comes to my mind is my take on the quiz POSH. The test passed, the thoughts still linger on.
I’m not going to judge anybody. I’m here to throw my views on how I take my life one day at a time. For me, the first time I madly fell in love was a life changer. It catalysed a wonderful change in me. I still live true to that change. The question that I asked my self decades ago, is the same question I ask myself every single day of my life. I love to find that my answer has not changed in a long long time.
“Would I be comfortable, or entertained, or amused or void of anger and disgust, if SOMEONE WERE TO DO THAT TO MY girlfriend, or my sisters or my mom or the friends that I’ve made so far?”
There is a broad , really broad line that blurs attraction and perversion. Attraction is natural. Perversion is a choice that we make. We refuse to acknowledge the perversion because
1. We cant fathom the impact it has on the women around us
2. We think its an acceptable norm
3. We think there is no harm in it and it’s a harmless crime
4. We know we wont get caught.
While awareness helps us understand the realities around points 1 and 2. It’s attitude that mandates the changes that one makes around 3 and 4.
I’m way too insignificant to change the world. I know that and I accept that and respect my place in this wide vast world. That being said, I still make an effort to not encourage that behaviour when I’m around with my friends. A quick challenge does help discourage such a behaviour. People tend to not indulge in their “opinions” when I’m around. It is a change. I am that agent of change. It’s only a question of time before a lot of us make that effort.
I’ll keep the blog short. I’ll leave you with the same question that changed my life a decade ago.
“Would YOU be comfortable, or entertained, or amused or void of anger and disgust, if SOMEONE WERE TO DO THAT TO YOUR girlfriend, or YOUR sisters or YOUR mom or YOUR friends that you’ve made so far?”
The thought has been plaguing me for a while. I chose to put my words to a better use today.
Be the person that the women in your world would be proud of. 🙂